Green Lantern (2011)
Writer: a ton of people. there are 7 listed on imdb. you can look them up if you want
Director: Martin Campbell
Starring: Ryan Reynolds (who will always be billy from nickelodeon's "15" to me), Blake Lively
a test pilot guy is chosen by the ring of a dying alien guy of the green lantern corps. he gets super powers. this super bad alien guy known as parallax with the super power of "fear" sucks the fear out of everyone he comes across in the universe on his way to earth to destroy the ring of the guy (dead alien) who originally imprisoned him.
ho-ho-HO!!!!! wowzers. i should start by saying i'm not a DC person. with the exception of batman anyway. the only things i know about the green lantern are from the couple of episodes his origin story was featured in the tim daly superman cartoon. i also haven't finished watching it yet. the kid woke up at the hour and a half mark. my impression so far is pretty laughable. this thing oozes of 11 year old boy. if i were an 11 year old boy i would probably love this movie. explosions, special effects, super hero...yeah. but speaking as a 33 year old chick who used to be into comics and still dons the dork factor now and then, i have laughed a lot about the whole thing. the concept is too hokey for me to get past. the explosions and special effects do not distract me from the "let's fight fear with fear" as in fear as a tangible power....fought by "will" which must be a stronger force...obviously. it's also conveniently color coded for those of you not paying attention. for those of you who love graphs and charts...color coded ones. i have to find the speech where i had to tamp down the howls of laughter for fear that i was on borrowed time from nap anyway. one moment please...
Hal Jordan: This new weapon of yours, you can't use it. Once you've crossed that line, once you've given into fear, you'll never go back. I've seen it. Look, I know right now you're afraid.
Guardian #1: You dare accuse the Guardians of feeling fear?
Hal Jordan: Yes, I do. And that's exactly why Parallax is beating you. Because you're afraid to even admit you're afraid! I know. I spent my entire life doing it. You know, we have a saying on earth, we say; I'm only human. We say it because we're vulnerable. We say it because we know we're afraid. But it doesn't mean we're weak. Help me save my planet. Don't give in to fear. Fight it! Fight it with me!
hahahahahahahahahaha. this is the kind of shit you should only read on a page with some art and envision in your mind. when it comes to life on screen it's just too over the top. stay tuned for my second installment....
soooo. the only thing that can beat fear is...the sun? ok. i maintain my wowzers. this dude can use anything he imagines and he imagines catapults, and giant springs, and howitzers or whatever? lame. instead of the power of "will" he should use the power of "imagination". the graphics in the space sequence in the final battle made me cackle. CACKLE! i'm totally showing that part to moster. the bad guys in this were really kind of a let down too. victory was won so easily, and yet the over 7200 members from the 3600 sectors of the green lantern corps could not even think of defeating this guy? by the way this specificity of these numbers made me laugh too. this was so amazingly bad, i hope there's another! it makes me smile to even think of the possibility of a sequel. i could tell just from the way of this thing that i should sit through the credits. i knew there would be a little snippet of more to come. good job me. you mean sinestro becomes sinister? NO WAY!!!!