Thursday, March 29, 2012
The Ministers (2009)
"Written" and "Directed" by Franc. Reyes
Starring John Leguizamo, Harvey Keitel, and ehat's her face from one life to live. thea?(sp?)
UHHHH. this dude who is a policeman gets gunned down in front of his young daughter who grows up to become a policeman with her dad's old partner. the dude's killers have not been caught. enter john leguizamo and his twin brother exacting revenge on behalf of god. good twin leguizamo starts courting daughter of brain matter policeman who he, apparently, has been obsessed with this whole time. it's okay, folks. he's the good twin. bad twin is loosing his grip on reality. you can tell him apart from good twin because he has burns on his face. more things with stupid details. showdown. curtain falls.
I really just want to write a thousand words about Harvey Keitel's apparent gambling problem. Instead, we'll do it like this: Mr. White, The Lieutenant, Winston Wolf, Ray Donlan, Joseph Bruno. We laughed at this movie. Frequently.
jeebus, was this a pile of crap! i didn't know a movie of this caliber could be made. seriously poor. the plot was stupid and stupidly complicated with details you didn't need to know or care about. the lead was a detective who freaked out about everything. we're talking major meltdown...about everything. they all kept referring to her as a "rookie" too which annoyed the shit out of the husband and i because she was a DETECTIVE! a promotion to us in the real world. this whole experience just reeked of amateur movie making. i don't know why keitel and leguizamo agreed to be in this nonsense. it was a sigh of relief when it was over.