Water for Elephants (2011)
Writer: Richard LaGavenese (screenplay), Sara Gruen (novel)
Director: Francis Lawrence
Starring: Mr. Sparkle McGlitterpants, Reese Witherspoon, Christoph Waltz
a vet-in-training's parents are killed while he's taking his final exam. instead of finishing school at cornell he leaves town and joins the circus. he falls in love with an elephant and the wife of the tyrannical and wife beating owner/ring master.
i don't know what i was expecting for this one. it was just a movie that exists. predictable. shme, shme, shme. it confirms that what's his face sparkle sparkle cedric diggory can't really act. i feel like i watched that one where he plays the bi-curious salvador dali and he didn't do too bad, but maybe i'm wrong. maybe when he's hot for chicks it just doesn't work and he just squinty smiles and all the ladies sigh. i don't get it. eh. serious romance dramaness is not my thing. to me, reese witherspoon's character was just all of a sudden in love with the glitter man. yes. her husband was a horrible human being. yes. i could understand why she would want to escape. but there was no falling in love process. no montage! it was just BAM! i'm attracted to you let's run away together. it wasn't even directed in a spectacular way. i was thinking more of a "carnivale" feel. with the vignettey saturated style. man, that show was awesome. fucking shame. this came off as "the notebook" 1930's circus style. kinda lame.
i find it interesting, just as a side note, that bad guy cristoph waltz was the only character with depth. his character was struggling to make his business survive, and all the stress that entails. he ruled with his fists, but it seems like he did that because it was the only way he knew. the duality of his friendship/tutelage with glitter. the leads were both paper thin. i would like to give a shout out to cristoph waltz for being the best thing about this movie. shocking.