Queue Total

284 MOVIES (released titles only)

Note: Real spoilers are in black text on a black background. Highlight the black areas to read the spoilers.

Queue Numbers

#50- Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown

#100- Black Swan

#200- Mysteries of Lisbon

Last- Once Upon a Time in Anatolia

Tuesday, April 24, 2012

Volcano High

Volcano High (2001)

Writer: Tae-gyun Kim, Dong- heon Seo
Director:Tae-gyun Kim
Starring: Hyuk Jang (Andre 3000)

yet another mtv attempt at uber coolness in the form of a dubbed korean movie about a high schooler with special powers who fights off the dictatorial staff of his newest high school (he's gotten kicked out of 8 other schools because of his rebellious streak and use of said special power). the staff also has special powers, well at least one guy does. bad martial arts choreography, and a boring plot make this a sure pass for most of the population.

This movie was an extreme disappointment.  The beginning of the opening credits got us amped up for some kind of interesting dream-sequency-thingy about at least one black high school student thinking he was in another world.  And then the dubbing set in.  It's the kind of showcase for hip hop artists; and most of them were clear enough in their speech.  I've seen Snoop walk onto a stage and take the teleprompter and make it sing.  There were lines here that even he couldn't save.

I don't think this movie would have been better if the source material was better; and I'm quite confident that the source material is also a piece of shit.  While it's clear that scenes were edited and re-ordered--one in particular actually reversed chronology in a notable way--that doesn't change the fact that this is just another Harry Potter knockoff; and the whole notion of Harry Potter is nothing more than another iteration of the "geeky kid at school" archetype.

I really, really didn't enjoy watching this.  I didn't even enjoy making fun of it.  I don't want my lack of verbosity here to connote any sort of tacit approval or even dismissal.  This is shit and you should not watch it.  It's insulting to my intelligence and it's far more insulting to the intelligence of the fans of the musicians (or "musicians" in some cases) who it actually attempts to hoodwink.

The Woman
sigh. i feel the description on the netflix site and envelope are deceiving in this instance. it's a korean movie dubbed with the voices of hip hop artists and tracy morgan and pat morita. the dubbing was so distracting and it could NOT be turned off. i guess it was supposed to be like the old school kung fu movies, but it wasn't an old school kung fu movie. it was a korean movie that came off like a live action anime and those, let me tell you, are never successful. i got bored halfway through and stopped paying attention for awhile. it was really draggy from the beginning middle to the end. as discussed on the couch, not even in the original korean would it have been successful. bad. not even in a good way. but i still would have liked to have been able to watch it in it's original form. stupid mtv.

also the actors looked really too old to be in high school. and to be asian and look too old for high school means they must have been in their 50s. what's up with that?

if i had known (assuming i put it on the queue. i probably did, but moster could have with the whole snoop dogg/ pat morita in a movie together thing) it was dubbed it would have been a total pass.

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