Subway

Subway (1985)
Directed by Luc Besson
Written by Luc Besson
Starring Christopher Lambert, Isabelle Adjani, Michael Galabru, Jean Reno

Synopsis
? there is a guy who is a thief and he may or may not live in the subway. also there is a band with jean reno as the drummer.

MOster
I think I got a lot more out of this than Leila did, but I don't disagree with the 2.  It was extremely difficult to follow, and having to see it dubbed rather than with subtitles didn't help (not least because the reading would have kept us more focused on the screen).  Lambert plays his retarded, optimistic, opportunistic small-time crook as a gleeful fool; and while it's over the top it matches the film.

There's a lot of Besson in the movie.  But it seems like he's much more consistent at making things look nice than he is at making them make sense.  By the end of the movie I understood most of what was happening but not nearly enough why it was happening.  By the end of the movie I had enjoyed watching many individual frames and scenes.

The Woman 
i didn't pay attention to the first 20 minutes of this movie and then i couldn't understand what was going on so i didn't really pay attention to the rest of it. i was basically annoyed that i had to sit through the rest of it. i found myself counting down the minutes until it was over. i missed the ending completely because i was involved in my sketchbook project whose deadline quickly approaching.... the best thing about this whole experience was seeing jean reno with hair and young and all punked out. also the music was not bad either.

Knowing

Knowing (2009)


Warning this whole review is a spoiler. if you want to see this movie i pity you.


Writer: Ryne Douglas Pearson, Juliet Snowden, Stiles White
Director: Alex Proyas
Starring: NICHOLAS CAGE!, Rose Byrne, and a couple of kids

Synopsis
a little girl puts a paper with a bunch of numbers in a time capsule in 1959. NICHOLAS CAGE's kid gets it 50 years later. it is a bunch of dates when tragedies happened, the number of people killed and the "gps coordinates" where this terrible event occurred.

The Woman
ok. let's get over the whole fact of why this little girl wrote down all these other terrible events when all anyone is really concerned with is the last one. and how there must have been tons more things that slipped through her little future seeing numerology, and how it's just a plot device to get MIT astrophysicist professor NICHOLAS CAGE to pay attention and believe in god. i sat through this in two sessions, and so coming back hours later i was not invested in the emotions of the characters at all for the second action packed half of this movie. from the beginning i was sitting there thinking to myself don't let it be aliens, don't let it be aliens, don't let it be aliens, aaaaarrrrrgh. it's aliens. there is a good concept to this movie. remove the aliens and the psychic predictor kid, and this is a totally scientific, plausible apocalyptic movie. you know what. i'll even give you the psychic kid back. not for the plausibility factor, but for the mysterious engaging factor. just take away the aliens and the noah's arc thing make everyone die and it would have been waaay better. then it would just be a rip off of cassandra's syndrome. 12 monkeys.

sorry adrienne, if you read this. i was with it until the second half.

Gentlemen Broncos

Gentlemen Broncos (2009)
Written by Jared Hess, Jershua Hess
Directed by Jared Hess
Starring Michael Angarano, Jermaine Clement, Hector Jimenez, Halley Feiffer, Jennifer Coolidge

Synopsis
Nerdy, home-schooled kid goes to a writing workshop thingy where he meets some odd people and enters his writing in a contest.  His submission is stolen by a washed up author.  People, advertently or not, take advantage of him and he grows a little aided by his mom.


The Woman
fantastic! i thought this was better than napoleon dynamite. there were way more levels to it and it still had that kind of humor. the science fiction novella in itself was totally awesome. jemaine is awesome. hector jimenez, though already established as awesome due to his contribution known as "the jumping jellyfish" was oscar worthy. jennifer coolidge's fashions...are indescribable. it's like a 14 year old came up with every aspect of this movie and that is a precious jewel. moster most likely disagrees with me, but that is because he is way more curmudgeonly than i.  i would also like to point out if this guy never made any movies we would not have the beloved terminology of "virgina" for a local destination, discovered on an adventure to imbibe this bard's tellings.

 it kind of makes me want to read/write terrible science fiction novellas. up to this point i have only attempted mermaid stories when i was 13 (?) with the excellent co-author becky and i know that is beautiful gold. i have a typewriter. one of the keys doesn't work. it takes tiny paper. this could work.

MOster
Yeah, this was a not-so-much for me.  I understand why my woman likes it, but no.  There were plenty of funny bits which didn't add all the way up.  Most of the best material is relegated to the fantasy sequences within the kid's story, and I will say that one of the successes is how we can follow the broad strokes of that story through a few relatively short sequences.  The ending also rang true, at least, but it wasn't nearly as satisfying as Napoleon's final dance.

There is funny here, but too much is too cringe-y.  Angarano's Benjamin has an excess of naivete.  Home schooled or not, he spends a fair amount of time online and I can't imagine that he would be so bizarrely unsavvy either interpersonally or professionally.  With the exception of Feiffer, who's unbelievable in a different way, practically all of the supporters go too far over the top.  Some of the Lonnie stuff in particular consists of repetitive jokes which only work half the time, and I fear that the usually-perfect Coolidge has acquired some static on her phone-in typecasting.

One more screenwriter and this could have been great.  I just hope it doesn't prevent Hess from trying again.

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Undead

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Undead (2009)
Written by Jordan Galland
Directed by Jordan Galland
Starring Jake Hoffman, Devon Aoki, John Ventimiglia

Synopsis
a lazy guy is made the director of a vampire version of "hamlet". funny things go on. vampires.

MOster
This exceeded my admittedly meager expectations.  The premise is actually ridiculous enough to be funny and the whole thing landed right on what you'd expect from a modern B movie.

As a series of interconnected items, the plot has a level of complexity which one doesn't often see on the sharer of its target demographic known as SyFy.  There are actual subplots which resolve into the finale.  The chronicle is comprised of cockeyed conceits, but they make a fertile field from which funny flourishes in many forms.  Lines such as "The Random Vampire Laws" (or whatever; I didn't write it down and there's nothing even apocryphal on IMDB) land squarely in your gut.  The whole notion of Hamlet the Vampire is in its way genius; and the secret organization is amusing on many levels.

Hoffman's Julian acts as a perfect surrogate for the audience in incredulity if not in choice of bedchamber (or diversity of bedmates).  He delivers his lines in exactly the way we do here on the couch while watching movies which take themselves just a little more seriously and stands just outside those characters who are essential to the mythos.  There's an odd patient-dude who feels like a callback to Wes Anderson.  And there's Ralph Macchio, who just might be the worst actor in the whole thing.

This weird little thing might have found that line which predecessors such as Snakes on a Plane failed to find.


The Woman
i had really low expectations for this, but it was an extremely pleasant surprise. i simply put it on the queue because ralph macchio was in the trailer and we are huge ralph macchio fans in this house and it didn't look unwatchable. this was actually pretty awesome. the last two or three independent, low budget vampire comedy movies we have put on have been totally lame (aka "netherbeast incorporated") so i was a little jaded. this had loads of great lines, and it didn't remotely pretend to be anything other than what it was. which was a great low budget comedy. good job guys. i approve. vampires.

IP Man

IP Man (2008)
Written by Edmond Wong
Directed by Wilson Yip

Starring  Donnie Yen, Siman Yam, Siu-Wong Fan, Ka Tung Lam

Synopsis
In the early 20th Century, Master Ip is the preeminent martial artist of his city.  Once the Japanese invade, he's relegated to working in labor camps--his house is the one usurped for use as the Japanese military HQ--until he is challenged by that military to fight.  This is apparently adjacent to a true story.




The Woman
i specifically put this on the queue for moster. the fight sequences in the trailer impressed me, so i knew they would interest him. this was pretty much a kung fu movie, but with a WWII theme. you know, avenge and defend. i can dig. he was a pretty cool guy. and like i said, the fight sequences were choreographed really well. apparently it's a true story....mostly likely -ish. they've made a sequel, and i don't think i can dig because the ending was pretty clear in this. so there may never be an ip man2 review on this thing. we'll see.....

MOster
This was better than I expected, but I can't help feeling that it's more than a little romanticized.  Aside from the obvious question (If Wing Chun is so awesome how come he's the only practitioner, let alone the only master?), there are some other practical matters to ignore.  But it's a legend, so whatever.  It's a little more interesting how given that the character is such a revered figure he doesn't always fight honorably.  I think this is because he's fighting the invading force and is supposed to be a badass, but it's hard to respect someone who will kill a foot soldier after he's tapped out.

That said, it's possible to ignore the plot enough to enjoy the rest of the production.  Yen plays Ip as a cool, reserved customer even when he's lost control, and the choreography is enjoyable.  Production value in general is quite pleasing and provides a polished aesthetic.

I'd say it's worth it for the fighting, but you can fast forward or glaze over the interstitial parts.

Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work

Joan Rivers: A Piece of Work (2010)
Directed by Ricki Stern, Anne Sunberg

Synopsis
a documentary crew follows joan rivers for a year. it follows her struggling for work and tells the story of her past.

MOster
This was a great documentary.  It either did a really good job of pretending to show us everything; or it actually was a no-holds-barred approach.  There were plenty of difficult moments from which the camera did not shy away.

The year covered in the film started pretty badly for Joan; but it then included both her Apprentice win and the picking up of (what we presume to be) her show on E!.  We really saw the roller coaster and how much she pushes forward and always looking for work; and we saw some pretty frustrating things for Joan both personally and professionally.

Behind the scenes stuff was good if not always great.  There was a little too much shakicam and zoom-in-for-the-big line, but so what?  The cameras were where they had to be when they had to be there.  The filmmakers used just the right amount of stock footage to get their point across while making me want to seek some older Rivers stand up.

Put all these elements together and you get a fascinating look at someone who's a comedy icon regardless of gender.


The Woman
yet another good documentary. i love me some joan rivers though. it was an interesting look inside her life. lots of funniness and some very emotional interviews too. which is something i've never seen before from her. she is one hot tamale though. sharp as a whip. i appreciated it's honesty as well. i couldn't imagine working as hard as she does, doing all she does in a day and i'm more than half her age. i do think she gets away with alot of the stuff she says because of her age. meaning, even though she hasn't changed since she started the general public is more accepting of an older woman being "vulgar" and brutally honest. it ends with her opening for rickles, and all i could think was jesus, what a show that must be!

State of Play (2003 BBC)

State of Play (2003)
Written by Paul Abbott
Directed by David Yates
Starring John Simm, Kelly Macdonald, Bill Nighy, David Morrissey, Polly Walker, Marc Warren

Synopsis
Follows one newspaper's investigation into two seemingly unconnected deaths, one a young black finagler and one a research assistant for an up-and-coming MP (who was having an affair with that MP).

This is a six-hour BBC miniseries; and in Britain when you have a show that's an hour long it is actually 57 minutes.

The Woman
fantastic!!! this is just yet another example of why british tv rocks tocks. six episodes of a mystery that just keeps on giving. i just wrote for fifteen minutes about this and then it was lost. so now all i'm going to say is this was way better than i can imagine the movie is. cutting four hours out of a mystery that gives for every minute. i can't see it working. WATCH THIS! fuck russel crowe. and what i had written before was funnier mourn the loss of it.

MOster
Finally.

Jumping into the action with an inexplicable murder of a relatively unimportant person and flowing easily into the next case, we were hooked by the second scene in one of the back rooms of Parliament.  As the narrative shifts between groups of characters before settling for the most part on the newsroom the sense is always one of purpose.  The production finds just the right note between gritty reality show and polished film. The level of tension is pitch-perfect for the duration of the story.


At its essence this is the story of six fairly intelligent people working more than full-time to figure out an extremely complicated situation, but in the entire runtime the viewer doesn't feel left behind. There are no diversions, only things which take longer to connect. We get some real details into how the investigation works and how the reporters manipulate people and situations to get at facts.  The piece doesn't shy away from the gray areas associated with the case and as the story continues to unfold each character conveys his or her standpoint on the multidimensional field ethics and morality.

Witnessing their successes and defeats I found myself as giddy or frustrated as if I were a member of a team perfectly assembled from the seemingly endless talent pool available to the BBC.  Bill Nighy's editor has the best barbs and (political correctness aside) is an actual manager.  Looking back at how he manipulates his staff in their varying levels of professionalism it's easy to see an overall strategy as he plays them against political machinations which only he can see.

At the conclusion of this masterwork we were left utterly satisfied.  Six hours of material and nary a missed moment.  The only question I still have is: Who the fuck thought they could turn this into a two-hour Hollywood movie?  Oh yeah, Russell Crowe.